Dear President Trump: Happy Easter III

Lorrance Herring
3 min readApr 12, 2020
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Dear President Trump,

This is the Big Rooster in the Sky. I am very sorry to inform you that I am not happy with your attitude that lacks an element of humility. Therefore, this is the season for all of humanity to humble themselves before God, and apologize for ever trying to be puffed up with pride.

I must remind you that pride comes before a fall. Now, if you want to inspire American Pride, I would suggest you take pride in the Mother Hens of your nation, and stop torturing them by taking away access to their loved ones. I am also working very closely with Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny, not to mention the Easter Chicken and my other daughters and sister brides.

They have been praying to me and I have heard their pleas. PLEASE apologize for ever grabbing at women’s body parts without their consent, and for being a puppet and buffoon while MY entire world and my darling daughters’ worlds have been in crisis since you have come into power and they have been traumatized and left bereft of their families, and their children.

You are a dangerous man who just might have bitten off more than you can handle. Yet, the sheeples of the world continue to believe that you are MY “anointed”…I usually flap my wings when I hear that and it ruffles my feathers.

I want you to just STOP IT! just STOP IT!

Stop hoarding your wealth while my people are perishing! Stop worrying about whether or not you will get re-elected, while mothers are crying themselves to sleep every night, while women are getting raped every day, and while corruption is running rampant throughout the earth.

Easter may be a special day for you, but for some of the female citizens in the United States who were born and raised in America, they are being denied the ability to practice their religious rights for years. They are not being given their HUMAN RIGHTS! I have watched the women in the United States get treated like human puppy mills, like objects to be sexually used and tossed away, and they have been unfairly treated in courts of law by ignorant leaders with sexual issues such as you.

As the Big Rooster in the Sky, I am well aware of male animalistic behavior, and how much power men can wield over women and mothers while under their thumbs. So, as a leader, you have more problems than just this pandemic with which to deal.

You have a nation riddled with “Parental Alienation Complex,” it seems to be a PAC game, almost like a football game, or a game of “Ba,” without any playbook.

You also seem to have a nation full of scapegoats, and black sheep.

Baa, Baa, Black Sheep have you any wool? Yes, sir! Yes, sir! Three bags full! One for my master and one for my dame…and one for the Little Boy who lives down the Lane…way over here in Lane County, Oregon, where I watch the world from a Bird’s Eye view.

Have a wonderful Easter with your children and your wife. You have truly been given a special family. Almost as special as the Easter Bunny’s and the Easter Chicken’s.

Love,

The Big Rooster in the Sky, a.k.a God, Jesus Christ, and the rest of the farm animals who work for me over here in Oregon.

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Lorrance Herring

Oregon born, Bardass Poet, Bat-Shit Crazy Stand-Up Comedian, Entertaining Social Activist, Mamadadaist Artist of 8 kids, Weirdo Wonder Woman, Narc Researcher