Does Boycotting or Protesting Work?

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In recent news, Turkey is boycotting France because the head Turkey has his feathers ruffled over France’s propensity to mock other countries and religious icons in their presses and newspapers.

It is a French tradition to uphold such freedoms!

France has long been a leader in the arts and has produced some of the best philosophers and literature of the secular FREE world!

Where would we be without French satire and French culture? Where would we be without French ballet, French silk, French wine, French fries, and Escargot?

President Recep Tayyip Erdogan needs to take a chill pill! But, humans are basically radical idiots, so as a bunch of Turkeys haul everything from France off their shelves in protest, I’m thankful to be in America where I can mock anything and everything I choose…even myself, my own religion, my own parents, my own family, my own school, my own country’s separation of church and state.

I can protest eating anything from Turkey this Thanksgiving, and even protest eating turkey as I begin a brand new tradition:

Without my dear children around my Thanksgiving table once again, I am protesting eating turkey! Fuck turkeys!

I’ll be thankful for a baked American Potato, loaded with Scandinavian cheese, American sour cream, green onions, and mock bacon bits. I might enjoy some stuffing drenched in English mint sauce.

I can’t boycott everything from England just because I have been offended and mocked by people from England. I’d have to boycott all of America and learn a new language. I’d have to burn all my books, including the Bible my dad gave to me as a child. I’d have to boycott my own children, who have English blood in them…I’d have to boycott myself, since I have Bloody Royal English blood in me as well!

Damned! I’d have to boycott the BEATLES and stop listening to their sacred music…what would I do without the music of the Beatles? Somedays, “Maxwell’s Silver Hammer” is what keeps me to able to laugh at what I was accused of doing to one of my OWN children as I tried to teach her how to clean her room and how to remove doors from hinges.

I’d knock my own head off its hinges before I knocked off anyone else’s head.

Bloody well right!

I’d have to boycott SACRED Jesus and SECULAR Christmas and go back to my sacred and secular roots of Paganism…which, of course, involves my ancient Greek heritage of embracing the SACRED Greek deities such as Zeus, Hera, Diana, and Dionysus, and my ancient Nordic roots of worshipping the SACRED deity Nerthus.

I’d have to boycott worshipping under oak trees on Skinner’s Butte that have holes near their base that resemble a woman’s yoni and cancel my plans to turn the dead tree in my front yard into a great big carving of a penis in my attempt to bring back phallic worship from the Old World.

I have the RIGHT to freedom of expression and the RIGHT to embrace satire, because as an American woman, I have already been treated as if I came from a third-world country by a man from England, an ex-husband who I “boycotted” after I had enough of his bad behavior during our “Christian” marriage. I was tired of following behind him twenty paces and keeping my head down, not allowed to make eye contact with other men or have conversations with other men.

In my opinion, MEN are often ridiculous and often fascinated with their penis and their dick-head need to be RIGHT all the time. Thank the universe that over here in America, if you’re already poor and you pay out the nose for an education at a University, you can go into debt and get your eyes open to what SATIRE is all about.

You can read all about Anglo-Irish satire and gross yourself out reading Jonathan Swift’s “Modest Proposal” which goes into great detail concerning the proper way to prepare and eat human babies instead of turkeys for Thanksgiving or Christmas. Of course, the author was almost killed for writing such a ridiculous solution to overpopulation and the current famine taking place in Ireland.

As a mother of eight children, I was able to weather through the personal offense I felt while becoming educated and fine-tuning my own reasoning and writing skills.

Today, I am a professional PROTESTER and a professional SATIRIST. After going up against a bunch of idiots in the court of law who suggested I donate blood, I promptly went home and created a piece of art depicting a certain lawyer’s big bloody butt from a drop of MY sacred blood…and called it “Bloody Art”…someday, it will be worth millions and then I can pay her back for her damages.

One of France’s BEST tools for teaching is satire. I hold French teachers and French satire and ALL human life, including ALLAH human life, and a HELLAH LOTTA human life as more sacred than ANY dead Muslim Prophet, or ANY dead Christian Prophet, or ANY dead Jewish Prophet, or ANY idiot President of ANY country, including my OWN!

Long live the GODDESSES! Long live women writers! Long live women satirists! Long live MOTHERS! Long live MY personal prophets…my OWN sons and daughters birthed from MY sacred vagina!

Long live ENGLAND! The land of Bastards and the Beatles, Sluts and Harlots!

Whew! If it wasn’t for the freedom of expression over here in America, I’d consider taking my chances in France, the land that gave us the guillotines.

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Oregon born, Bardass Poet, Bat-Shit Crazy Stand-Up Comedian, Entertaining Social Activist, Mamadadaist Artist of 8 kids, Weirdo Wonder Woman, Narc Researcher

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Lorrance Herring

Lorrance Herring

Oregon born, Bardass Poet, Bat-Shit Crazy Stand-Up Comedian, Entertaining Social Activist, Mamadadaist Artist of 8 kids, Weirdo Wonder Woman, Narc Researcher

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